A New Perspective
Posted: May 5th, 2011 | Author: Molly Monet | Filed under: tips for a peaceful divorce | Tags: blogging, ex husband, perspective | 1 Comment »![past the point of love, (made it to #2 explore !) [10,00streamviews!]](http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3201/2529813630_b2124b701f.jpg "past the point of love, (made it to #2 explore !) [10,00streamviews!]")
Many of my readers write to me privately to tell me that they want a peaceful divorce but that their exes’ actions are causing them hurt feelings and anger. Clearly, no one leaves a marriage feeling satisfied with their spouse’s behavior, and the post-divorce period usually makes things worse, as you have to make difficult financial and child rearing decisions. So how do you find a way to forge peace between you and your ex? By looking within yourself.
There is no way to control your ex’s behavior. That was one of the first lessons that I learned post-divorce. If I couldn’t control him when he was living with me, I certainly couldn’t once he was gone. So I gave up trying, and that was a huge relief.
I came to realize that the only control I have is over my own thoughts and actions. So I tried instead to look at myself and my divorce from a new perspective. Once I was able see myself and my ex with new eyes, my world seemed a little brighter.
I just published this story today on the Huffington Post, so I invite you to look at me with new eyes and go check out the piece. As always, I would love to hear your thoughts.
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Really there’s no way to control anyone else’s behaviour, which is an important lesson for all of us in our quests for happiness. Thanks for the reminder.